With open arms

Just in case you forgot tomorrow is Valentine’s Day:

Oh, sure. I can see it now:

Hey, honey, I ditched the Godiva chocolates this year and got you disembodied arms that talk.

Because nothing says “I love you” like disembodied arms that talk. Is it just me, or is that ten different kinds of creepy?

Seriously, I picture these arms springing to life in the middle of the night while their unsuspecting recipient sleeps in his/her bed. Then, the slow-mo crawl across the floor with its fat Mickey Mouse fingers, up and onto the bed, the recorded message playing on a continuous loop until its meaning becomes tragically ironic.

Yeah. Nothing says Valentine’s Day like that.