Category: Kids

What do you suppose he has in mind?

So after school, Andrew sometimes uses my computer. On the front page of Amazon.com, I found these in the recently viewed items:

  • World Industries Complete Skateboard (4 Styles) by Bravo Sports
  • Mojo Rails Complete Skate Park by Mojo Rails
  • RAMPTECH MICRO 3′ HALFPIPE PLANS by RAMP TECH

I have to mention that the Mojo Rails Complete Skate Park is on sale, for ~ $4,000. A steal. Plus, it qualifies for Amazon Prime. Hey, free shipping! Seriously, they’re practically paying you to get one.

I wonder if this has something to do with the skateboard tournament he said he wanted to host a few weeks back. Being boring and practical, I mentioned things like insurance, liability, massive lawsuits, and so on. He was unmoved.

The real question is why hasn’t he approached Miss B. She would gladly construct a skate park for him out of paper.

That would work, wouldn’t it?

They don’t listen to me either

So, last night I’m in one room, the kids in another. There might have been (nerf) football throwing going on. But it was getting close to bedtime, so I say:

Me: No more rowdy. It’s time to get ready for bed. Play a quiet game.

Kids: Okay!

Andrew (after a barely imperceptible pause): Kyra, throw this at me as hard as you can.

Yeah. Some days it’s like talking to the walls.

In which I acquire my own PR person

So, we were at Andrew’s guitar lessons last night. His lesson is actually next door to the actual music store (locally owned for fifty years!), in the back of an antique (or junk, depending on how you look at it) shop.

I promised the kids Cold Stone afterwards to celebrate Andrew making the honor roll. So, he was in a practice room, Kyra was inspecting the knickknacks and sneaking up and down the hall, playing spy girl–pretty much what she does every time she comes along with us.

Another mom was there, talking to the clarinet teacher. We’ve chatted before during the overlap of our kids’ lessons. She declared Miss B, as always, the cutest thing. (I’m pretty sure “cutest thing” is in Miss B’s job description.) Then she told me I must be an actress (!) because she knows she’s seen me somewhere before. (Other than music lessons, that is.)

I said, no, actress was pretty much the last thing I’d ever be.

Then Miss B chimed in: “She writes books!”

Sadly, the other mom seemed to believe actress the far more believable scenario.

But it’s nice to know Miss B will speak up on my behalf.

Dog and cat, living together

dogcats

So, we integrated the dog and the cat this weekend. We waited a while to do this since Oreo was so tiny when we brought her home from the Humane Society and Sparky is pretty hefty. Plus, Oreo was underweight. Uh, clearly, this isn’t an issue any more.

They had a good time yesterday–maybe too good of a time. If I had to describe them this morning, I’d say they were hungover.

Yesterday, Miss Kitty also dictated some notes to Miss B. Here’s what kitty had to say:

  • I love Kyra.
  • I sleep lots.
  • I have a smelly nose.
  • I have a waggy tail.

You’ll note that the cat does not profess any love for the rest of us.

More later, maybe we’ll even take a trip into the (twilight) zone with Butler. But now, I’m off to cook some turkey sausage and cinnamon rolls.

It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s Super Girl

So today, since it was so lovely out, I once again put together the kids, their Halloween costumes, my digital camera, and the guest of honor, Microsoft Movie Maker.

But when I first grabbed my camera and checked to see what was on there, I noticed Andrew had used it to take several pictures of himself and the cat. I give you a new take on human/animal relations:

 The Blair Witch Cat Project

Just be glad I spared you the photo he took of the cat using her litter box.

On to the movie. Last year, it was Snow Princesses and Werewolves. This year, we call this one Super Girl vs. Freddy Krueger (aka Revenge of the Marvelous Miss B).

The sweet smell of edible Australia

So, today I bring you a recipe that may surprise you. It’s for Rice Krispie Treats. I know what you’re thinking: Dude, no way! You have to buy those at the grocery store–proof that they’re just too hard to make.

I used to think the same thing, but really, it’s not difficult to master the recipe. In fact, today, I’ll present both the basic recipe and some advanced techniques. You can thank me later.

First, what you’ll need:

Note: While it’s esthetically more pleasing to place the butter in the center of the dish, it doesn’t affect the actual recipe.

  • 3 tablespoons butter/margarine
  • 1 bag marshmallows
  • 6 cups Rice Krispies

First, melt the butter, then add the marshmallows. It will look something like this:

Mmmmm. Melty high fructose goodness.

When the marshmallows are all melted, add the Rice Krispies. This can be a little tricky:

Challenging, but worth it.

Spread the mess yummy goodness into a 9 x 13 inch pan that you’ve previously hosed down coated with cooking spray. Use a buttered spatula or waxed paper to keep the mess from sticking to everything in known creation press the treats into the pan.

And that’s it! And I know what you’re thinking: That’s easy! I’ll never buy Krispie Treats from the store again!

Now that you’ve mastered the fine art of the Krispie Treat, you can use them a launch pad for more experimental work. I give you: Edible Australia:

You’ll need a bigger pan because Australia is … big. We recommend you outline Australia beforehand.

Sometimes it’s good to have your map of Austalia by your side while you work.

Australia is surrounded by a lot of ocean. You’ll need blue frosting for that. But don’t panic. You can make your own.

Attention to detail is important.

Voila! All you need now is the finishing touches (brown sugar for deserts, cookie crumbs for mountains, and Swedish fish (?) for the ocean) from your classmates, and you have Edible Australia.

The real reward will come not in the post-quiz consuming of (some of) Edible Australia but whether older women (aka eighth and ninth graders) will ask you to share some of it on the way out of school.

The education of Miss Kitty

Poor kitten Oreo.

First, it was the makeover. Word to the wise. Kittens don’t really like makeovers.

Actually, it started as lotion. Then Kyra realized lotion + kitten fur = mess. So, she put kitty in the sink and washed her.

No, I wasn’t idly standing by watching her do this. I walked in during the still-slightly-soaked, towel-drying stage. I explained to Kyra that kitties really didn’t like makeovers (or water) and she’d have to find another game to play with Oreo.

Now, kitty is going to school. She has homework every night. A couple of days ago, Kyra called to me to “come see what kitty learned.”

“What did kitty learn?” I asked.

Kyra gave a slight sigh, shook her head. “Not much.”

She had two pieces of paper on the floor, one that was filled with words, the other, scribbles.

“I don’t know what to do.” Again with the teacher-like head shake. “She just scribbles.”

I came home last night to find Kyra on the floor, doing kitty’s homework for her. Oreo was helping by batting the pen with her paw.

So, poor kitty is still pre-literate. I say “pre” because, clearly, she has an enthusiastic tutor.

Which is probably better than an enthusiastic makeup artist.

Looking for John Green

John Green, author of the young adult novels An Abundance of Katherines, Looking for Alaska, and the soon to be released Paper Towns was here in Minnesota.

Not only was here here in Minnesota, but here at our local library today, about the same time Kyra had a birthday party to attend. Here’s how it went.

Andrew and I dropped Kyra off at the party, which was being held at one of those inflatable jump places. This was a new place that opened up right across the road from an already established inflatable jump place. So, if you venture into this part of town, all your jumping needs are pretty much taken care of.

We made it back to the library with about ten minutes to spare. We wandered into the teen section where we met up with some very excited girls who were also looking for John Green. Turned out he was scheduled for the meeting room on the first floor, so we all headed down there.

I stood in line to buy some books to be autographed. The big surprise? Penguin sent a bunch of his soon-to-be-released book, Paper Towns, for the signing. Oh, sure. Some people might have an advance reader copy, but we have the real thing, and it’s signed.

Anyway, we lucked out and got our books right before John started to speak. He read from Paper Towns and then spoke, then took questions. Oh, and he did his happy dance. But with the last question, it was time to pick up Kyra. I loaded down Andrew with our books. He was nervous and told me to hurry.

I raced out. On the drive, I realized I should’ve told him to give up his #50 spot in the book signing (yes, they were handing out numbers) and just stand at the back of the line. I so wanted to get a picture of John signing a book for Andrew. Instead, when Kyra and I returned to the library, Andrew was waiting outside, books in hand.

We went back in anyway. Kyra wanted books she could read herself and Andrew wanted a snack. We ate, then ventured down to the meeting room. John was still there with just the library staff. I explained how I missed the signing and could I please get a picture of Andrew and John together?

Well, I could:

It’s clear: John is made of awesome. In this photo, Andrew is also made of awesome, but with a dash of ‘tude thrown in.

John is incredibly gracious, so it’s no surprise that he let us take the photo. The real surprise? Minutes prior, Andrew inhaled two hot dogs, each with about six packets of ketchup. While wearing a white shirt. But dude, check it: not a single stain.

Whew.

Oh, and Darcy? Look what’s coming your way this week.