Misc – Page 9 – Writing Wrongs

Temptation, thy name is Staples

I’d write something today, but …

Someone has stolen my chair.

So, yesterday, I took a trip to Staples. And walked out with a box containing ten reams of paper. That’s 5,000 sheets of paper.

That should keep me and Miss B supplied–at least for a little while. I think that’s enough for her to create an entire paper world, complete with its own paper ecosystem.

I also wandered into the clearance section and wandered back out with white boards in silly shapes and singing pens–all fifty cents each. Uh, these would be for the kids, not me.

In the end, I walked out without causing too much damage to my wallet. Still, even with clearance prices and rebates on paper, Staples is a dangerous place for a writer.

Why read the book?

When you can read the Wordle? Seriously. Check it. The Geek Girl’s Guide to Cheerleading:

I’m a little sad that geek isn’t larger. I’d thought we’d used that plenty o’ times. Ah, ha. Avoiding overuse. That’s it.

And just for fun, I did The Fine Art of Holding Your Breath. This may be the only way you read this book.

Look at how large the word one is here and in Geek Girl’s Guide. What’s up with that? Clearly this is my quirk.

Don’t worry. I haven’t forgotten Butler (or perhaps you wish I would). We’re having crunch time at work and I need more time to reflect on just what it is he’s saying.

So, we integrated the dog and the cat this weekend. We waited a while to do this since Oreo was so tiny when we brought her home from the Humane Society and Sparky is pretty hefty. Plus, Oreo was underweight. Uh, clearly, this isn’t an issue any more.

They had a good time yesterday–maybe too good of a time. If I had to describe them this morning, I’d say they were hungover.

Yesterday, Miss Kitty also dictated some notes to Miss B. Here’s what kitty had to say:

I love Kyra.
I sleep lots.
I have a smelly nose.
I have a waggy tail.

You’ll note that the cat does not profess any love for the rest of us.

More later, maybe we’ll even take a trip into the (twilight) zone with Butler. But now, I’m off to cook some turkey sausage and cinnamon rolls.

The weather: a study in contrasts

This was yesterday:

Children frolic in the sun-dappled leaves. Mother Nature rejoices.

This is today:

Yes, that’s snow. Somewhere, a woman screams. A baby cries.

The education of Miss Kitty

Poor kitten Oreo.

First, it was the makeover. Word to the wise. Kittens don’t really like makeovers.

Actually, it started as lotion. Then Kyra realized lotion + kitten fur = mess. So, she put kitty in the sink and washed her.

No, I wasn’t idly standing by watching her do this. I walked in during the still-slightly-soaked, towel-drying stage. I explained to Kyra that kitties really didn’t like makeovers (or water) and she’d have to find another game to play with Oreo.

Now, kitty is going to school. She has homework every night. A couple of days ago, Kyra called to me to “come see what kitty learned.”

“What did kitty learn?” I asked.

Kyra gave a slight sigh, shook her head. “Not much.”

She had two pieces of paper on the floor, one that was filled with words, the other, scribbles.

“I don’t know what to do.” Again with the teacher-like head shake. “She just scribbles.”

I came home last night to find Kyra on the floor, doing kitty’s homework for her. Oreo was helping by batting the pen with her paw.

So, poor kitty is still pre-literate. I say “pre” because, clearly, she has an enthusiastic tutor.

Which is probably better than an enthusiastic makeup artist.

You are the music in me

Your Taste in Music:

Eighties: Highest Influence

Adult Alternative: Highest Influence

Alternative Rock: High Influence

Nineties: High Influence

Punk: High Influence

How’s Your Taste in Music?

Hat Tip to Marianne for the quiz.

I’ve always suspected that whenever someone refers to “adult alternative” they mean “lame alternative.” I mean, is there a difference? Maybe it’s just me. I also realize the 80s were a long time ago, and I should do something about that.

Like learn to play Guitar Hero and put that knowledge to good use. Actually, Andrew’s guitar teacher likes Guitar Hero. He says it has renewed interest not only in guitar playing in general, but in music written for the guitar. He’s spent the past couple of years explaining to his students that this or that pop song doesn’t have a guitar part–it’s all synthesizer.

He seemed quite happy that Andrew wanted to learn how to play Iron Man and the opening to Green Day’s Holiday. Yes, this would be the 21st century version of a classical music education. What? You don’t know Bohemian Rhapsody? You heathen.

As an aside, Andrew’s guitar teacher also has a soul patch–omigod, could-you-just-die?

So, in the spirit of all that, I give you The Ramones, another band Andrew knows (I’m so proud *sniff*). Those of you who don’t want to listen to that last entry on my list (that would be punk), don’t click play, k?

Wow. The music video. She has changed over the years. No cgi for us. No, in my day, we didn’t have special effects. We made everyone wear their crappy Halloween costumes and we filmed up hill, both ways. Kids these days …

One week later: best friends

Got the election blues?

I got your cure, right here:

Meet Oreo, the newest member of our household. For those of you who know that we already own a dog and seven fish, I can hear you say: Are they crazy?

The short answer is probably yes. But today is Miss B’s golden birthday (six on the sixth) and what she wanted most was a kitten.

Here she’s tracking the cat teaser, or as Kyra calls it, the “pet joker.”

But even kittens need to sleep. I know it looks like she’s about to slip off, but not to worry. I just checked on them. She was sitting on Andrew’s rear end for a while, then moved to snuggle between them.

Getting here

Some people take the roundabout way of getting here. I don’t get search terms as much as search phrases. For instance:

we are losing the art of fine cooking

Oh, no, I’d say it’s already been lost, at least here, and for a very long time.

what can moms wear to jonas brothers concert

Anything that doesn’t embarrass your child.

my little pony and the jonas brothers

Seriously, people, if you’re looking for this, I don’t think I can help you.

swearing when writing for children

Yes. I find swearing helps when writing anything. Highly recommended.

Synchro and San Fran

If you ask my kids what they loved best about our San Francisco trip, they’ll both say: swimming and the beach. Seriously, I think they could have spent the entire time in the pool at my sister’s place and been completely satisfied.

True, Andrew’s a little unclear on the pointed toes concept:

This might be my favorite picture from the trip. It looks like she might end up doing a colossal belly flop, but she didn’t.

I love how she’s reaching for the sky.

Now that Geek Girl’s Guide has gone to copy edits (man, that sounds surreal), I’m back to working on The Fine Art of Holding Your Breath, AKA MacKenna’s story. In this pursuit I, of course, got sidetracked on YouTube, looking for synchronized swimming videos.

Because, you know, that’s really important for the writing. Also important, if you’re writing a book with a sport, make sure it’s one people like to mock (cheerleading, synchronized swimming, etc.).

Note to YouTube users: the video of your Cancun vacation where you’re clearly drunk and pretending to swim synchro? Not really funny. Trust me on that.

I’m hoping we get more good video from the Olympics. In the meantime, enjoy the following. Sure, they’re commercials, but they’re also pretty cool.